Revelation from the Theology of Suffering

Sunday 8/10/06

Dear brothers and sisters and intercessors:
“Now also Christ shall be magnified in my body, whether it be by life, or by death.” (Phil1:20) I have experienced different trials of life in the past week: sickness, investigations, the wait for reports and results, doctor’s diagnosis…We feel as though we are on an emotional roller-coaster. But praise the Lord, in the midst of it all, we are filled with the peace and joy of God that transcends all understanding.

Liver cancer is a terrible sickness and now it has struck me: One big mass in the liver and two smaller ones near the liver. At first, I was quite alarmed and from the depth of my heart, I questioned the Lord why He had allowed the evil one to attack me? But then I thought of the man born blind, he lived in perpetual suffering. Others asked, “Who sinned? This man or his parents?” Jesus answered instead that “Neither this man or his parents sin but that the work of the Lord might be displayed in his life.” The Word of the Lord silenced me and so I retreated into the Lord and remain steadfast in Him.

Apart from visiting the sick, this is the first time for me to be hospitalized because of sickness. Except for two nights at home, I spent the entire week in the hospital. I have no discomfort apart from a blotted abdomen. However I am forced to stop all that I was busying myself with and all responsibilities. As I look back, because of the busyness of the ministry, I had not been able to really remain in His rest, and the Lord is saying, “Be still and know that I am God.” During the time I was in the hospital, I had nothing planned, no papers to read, no meeting and no appointment. I saw the pain in the faces of the other patients, I also noticed how the medical staff diligently served the sick and I was able to reflect on what I saw.

It seemed that the Lord has brought me into His seminary and I was being taught the theology of suffering in my life. Because I felt I am to walk through it and personally experience it, I spent a lot of my time in prayer, stillness and meditation. In my prayer time, the Lord encouraged me by telling me “Do not fear, only believe!” The most terrible thing about cancer is that it evokes fear and worry. The Lord also told me, “I am your rock and your fortress, I am your security.” (Ps31). I have Jesus in my life, who shall I fear? So now I am learning to totally surrender and allow God to take control of my life. In life or in death, that Christ may be magnified in my life.

After the doctor explained the situation to us, I and my family decided to accept the doctor’s plan of management and proceed with chemotherapy for my liver cancer. The verdict of life seems hard to bear, but the Lord is giving me strength and power to face this major trial of life. This is not a personal trial but a spiritual war. The only way for us to win is for everyone to be in Christ, having a close relationship with Jesus. The church will win. Death has lost its sting for the Spirit of the resurrected Christ lives in me and He is showing forth His resurrection power. The first dose of the red-coloured chemotherapeutic agent was injected intravenously into my body and I felt the blood of Jesus covering me. Now I am resting at home. We continue to fight in this spiritual battle, but with your prayer and care, we will be victorious!!
Pastor Li kin Wah

Brothers and sisters, you can encourage Pastor Li through emailing him at kinwli@gmail.com Since you know, Pastor Li is passionate about ministry and he loves to be around people and share the gospel, but now he has to learn to let go of all this and focus on the Lord, please pray that the Lord will enable him to adapt to being all on his own during the daytime.
Mrs Li